Moonchild

"The moon is a loyal companion.

It never leaves. It's always there, watching, steadfast, knowing us in our light and dark moments, changing forever just as we do. Every day it's a different version of itself. Sometimes weak and wan, sometimes strong and full of light. The moon understands what it means to be human. 

Uncertain. Alone. Cratered by imperfection."

~Teheran Mafi, Shatter Me

I feel this quote captures my love for the Moon in its entirety. As some of you know, I fell in love with the Moon many Summers ago; interestingly enough it was around the time I was eleven or twelve, maybe thirteen. I know I was at least eleven and it was Summer, I stood outside while doing laundry and was mesmerized by the Full Moon. The Moon was gigantic, bright and Full; almost the fullest I've ever seen it. I stood under the Moonlight with my "best friend" at the time, we had been friends since I was five and she was six; unfortunately our friendship ended as we became teenagers. I've only had a few "best friends" after her before retiring the term from my vocabulary. I've had three "best friends", the first two disappeared; well ghosted before that was a thing and the third is no longer with us. Since he passed I've refrained from claiming anyone as my "best friend" that is until someone proclaimed themselves as such only to disappoint as the first two had. This is my reasoning for retiring the term altogether.

As the Moon orbits Earth, I feel enchanted. Although from my location only a partial eclipse will be visible however, I am anticipating the energy it will exude. As this eclipse calls for introspection I feel as if it is perfect timing for the journey I find myself on. It's as if many things are aligning to assist and guide me as I find myself fumbling less often than in previous years. Having a better understanding of the spiritual meaning of eclipses paired with the knowledge gained from my Astronomy course has been extremely beneficial in recent days. Especially as I hold a listening ear to my body and what she needs from moment to moment. Funny how so many random memories from my eleven year old self are coming up once I acknowledged the longing to be heard from within, 

Recently, I saw the numbers 9797 several times in one day; so I looked it up on an app I use called "Angel Numbers" and this is what was revealed:

WHAT NUMBER "9797" MEANS:

The resulting total number is #5:

You are being guided to move in a new direction. Hand over any fears and worries you may have regarding the changes that are presenting in your life right now to the Angels. Moving in a new direction will inspire adventure and will prove to be a very positive step for you.

Angel Power Word:

Listening

Your Angel Number also contains #97:

God is going to deliver a very important message to you. You will receive this message incidentally from another or via some form of audible media such as the television or through a song on the radio. This guidance is called 'Golden Tongued Wisdom'. Pay attention and keep your ears open!

(This number is repeated twice. The message of this number is amplified x20!)

Your Angel Number also contains #79:

God is devoted to surrounding you with love. It's time to open your heart to the 'De-Lightful' wonders that love can deliver. When love is presented allow yourself to accept love and to be loved. God's Angels declare that soon your heart may start to flutter.

I found it interesting that the power word was "listening" and that's what I've been doing for some time now when it comes to my younger self or should I say my "inner child"? Another thing I thought was quite "coincidentally" in alignment with my words as of late was the messages reference to the guidance of a new direction or as I say, journey. When the message speaks of allowing myself to accept love and to be loved, I felt that deeply as thoughts of my support system come to mind. I feel love *queue Donna Summer* I feel surrounded by loved ones; near, far, as well as from the ones who have passed on. The memories of them along with the wisdom they've shared with me has been coming to mind, this go round however, I am tuning in and allowing them [the memories and words] to resonate with my heart and spirit to refresh lessons learned along with messages I may now be in a space to receive. 

In my last post, "smoke in my eye", I spoke of missing the Moon and my lover as I concluded the expression; possibly leaving many of you wondering why I haven't spoken of my lover in some time. I'll start with the Moon, I've seen her many nights in various parts of the sky; yet only on a few occasions was I able to sit with her and embrace her energy while other times she was illusive; as she's known to be. There's a piece of me that feels void when the Moon isn't visible, I feel as if I am incomplete in some way, the some way is unfamiliar to me as I do not have the words to express the emptiness. After running errands and before beginning this expression I searched the sky for her to no avail, however, I did see Jupiter (with my unaided eye). Jupiter is known as the planet of good luck, abundance, balance and a host of other symbolic meanings. I find the sight of Jupiter to be calming and reassuring, as it gives me the push I desire to manifest my dreams so the fact I've seen Jupiter in the night's sky for several weeks now has given me such joy. 

The good thing I realize in this moment is although the Moon alludes me at times, I do not feel abandoned by her, as I know she will return at whichever phase she finds herself in. I feel that way at times, in particular when much time has passed without publishing an expression on the blog or social media. I feel deeply that although I may be quiet at times you all know that I have not abandoned you or my (therapeutic) platforms. Anyhow, back to the Moon and my lover; when I say "I miss my lover" to be honest I could've just spent time with him and I'll miss him already. It's nearly mind boggling how infatuated I find myself, at times I feel like a school girl with her crush and other times I feel like a woman in love. I used to feel silly as in irrational or ridiculous for having such feelings, or rather emotions, now I accept them as a part of my being; from my soul.   

In the not very distant past I thought of our interaction as if we were "star crossed lovers" (iykyk). I don't believe that anymore, I believe we've gone through our ups and downs to bring us together this time with a new appreciation and passion for one another. The passion leaves me speechless yet the parts I could share I feel are sacred which is why I haven't spoke of him in detail much. Like magic an expression I wrote nearly a year ago comes to mind and I am reminded of my word choices and the energy of my thoughts and feelings regarding him... "dark as a thousand midnights" as I allowed the words to consume me and the music to speak the words of my heart I am on memory lane, engulfed in love. 

I desire to remain there...